Selfishness is generally considered a negative trait. However, in many cases being selfish is not an inherent trait but an act, and it's not always a bad thing. There are situations when selfishness can be justified. Here are 5 situations when it's okay to be selfish in a relationship.
Any relationship is a two-way street that requires equal amounts of giving and receiving from each party. If you're being too selfless in a relationship, you might found yourself in a situation when you have less then enough resources to give. And that's when your allowed to be selfish. Here are some examples of such situations.
#1. When you spend too little time with your partner. If you want your relationship to succeed, you need to spend quality time together. Of course, we aren't saying that you have to spend all your free time with your partner, but your relationship should be one of your top priorities timewise. If you're feeling like your partner doesn't spend enough time with you, you have every right to be selfish and to demand that they make you a priority.
#2. When you need help and support. Two people in a loving relationship are supposed to be there for each other. So when you're feeling unhappy or struggling with the challenges that life presents you with, you should put yourself first and expect that your partner will support you. Of course, this goes both ways: your partner has the right to be selfish when they need your support.
#3. When you don't have anything to give. As we've already said, sometimes we become too selfless in a relationship, and it takes a lot out of us. When you're giving too much, you'll soon run out of resources to give. If you don't have enough resources to give and barely have anything left for yourself, it's okay to be selfish and let your partner balance things out.
#4. When you're exhausted. If you're exhausted and need a good night's sleep or even a vacation, do what you need to do. It is okay to act selfish in situations that have to do with your physical health, mental and emotional well-being. Don't feel guilty for not answering your partner's phone calls or texts because you're asleep or taking a vacation alone because you desperately need it but your partner can't take time off work.
#5. When you need some alone time. Even outgoing extroverts sometimes feel the need to spend some time alone. If you don't feel like being around people because you need to recharge, your partner should understand it. Just don't shut them out and take the time to explain that they've done nothing wrong, you just need some “me” time.
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