Any relations have their ups and downs, and sometimes you even don't know why you're still married to your spouse. Different problems that none of you wants to solve lead to divorce. If you want to keep your relations, then you should know about these 8 habits tat kill your marriage. It's time to change them!
#1 Addiction. There are many things that cause addiction: social media, drugs, alcohol, food, shopping, gambling and even cheating. Addiction is the third party in your marriage and it ruins it. Addiction is very dangerous, especially if one of the spouses is hooked on the adrenaline rush of a new relationship. In fact, it's the first step to cheating, even if there's no sex involved.
#2 Nagging. One of you is constantly unhappy with what you have. You want more money, better house, tastier breakfast... Complaining loud and long may give some short-term reaction, but it actually causes the powerful discontent on the other spouse's side.
#3 No sex. If you're constantly looking for an excuse not to have sex, then don't ask why your marriage is in trouble. Don't say that you're again not in the mood. The problem is not in your mood, but in your attitude toward your spouse. You can't feel good about your spouse, if you constantly fight and criticize each other. You can change your attitude by concentrating on the things that you love in your spouse. And next time when your spouse initiates sex, don't say “No”.
#4 Peacekeeping. While some couples fight, others try to do anything to maintain peace in their family. The answers like “whatever you say, dear” really keep your home quiet, but at the same time you accept the martyr's role. And finally you're angry, defensive and a drudge. So where's fun in that?
#5 No communication. How much time do you spend together talking to each other, except of fighting? Good communication makes both of you learn how to ask what you need. Make what you want clear and avoid assumptions and vague statements.
#6 Making unilateral decisions about big things. There are decisions that you can make on you own, for instance, the color of your bathroom, especially if your spouse is color blind. But there are some things that can't be decided by you only. You can't make major decisions concerning money, time, kids and family life unilateral. This way you cut off the responsibility of joint decision-making and deep intimacy.
#7 Arguing over money. Money and arguing over it may be the reason of many marriage woes. Constant fights over money is one the top predictors of divorce. The thing is that couples use harsher language when they argue over money, and it also takes more time to recover from the conflict. In order to avoid it make the financial planning a part of marital counseling. The couples who are to marry should share their credit reports.
#8 No fun. When you think only about home commitments, you may feel like you have no time for recreation. But you need some time to unwind, so don't miss the fun in your life. There are plenty of things you can do to make your married life more interesting. Try together new activities, invite your spouse for a walk at sunset, make time for a vacation just for two of you, etc.
- Most Difficult Years of Marriage, How to Compromise in Marriage, How to Survive Power Struggles in a Marriage, 10 Things You Should Never Say to Your Partner