How to Forgive a Friend Who Betrayed You

Embrace your feelings. Anyone who's been betrayed desires only two things: hurt the betrayer and forgive them. Immediate choice of any of them won't make anything good to you. Your hurting words will boomerang and make you feel a terrible person. And forgiving when you still don't want to will come off as a condescension. Neither of these will make up your friendship again. So embrace your feelings and let yourself grieve, shout, be mad or cry. If you a Christian, then pray to Lord to show you the right way.

Apology. The words “I'm sorry” won't reconcile your friendship, because it takes much more then simple apology. You have to understand why your friend did it to you and whether they are really sorry for what's happened. Your need a long conversation, and it must be initiated by your friend, not by you.

Apologize your friend only in case, if they demonstrate their understanding how their betrayal affected you and did to your reputation. For instance, your friend tried to mend everything they'd screwed up. If your friend can take these steps, then reconciling is possible, but it's still not sure.

Forgiveness. You can forgive your friend only in case, if you're sure that it will never happen again. Your friend might reassure you that they've learned the lesson, but it's only your choice whether to believe it or not. You have to understand that people usually don't change, and what happened once, may happen once again. And if your friend acts like this betrayal wasn't a big deal at all, then you have to face the truth, that making up is impossible. So take your time, don't haste, because now you have to find yourself and fill the hole in your soul with something. Only then you can forgive your friend.

Reconciliation. Making up is possible in case when feelings of each side have been heard and valued. Only then you and your friend can move forward to rebuilt your friendship. You have to understand that everything depends not only on you, your friend also has to make some efforts. As any kind of relations, friendship needs two people to work.

It's not always possible to make up with your friend again, although you feel like forgiving them. Don't make yourself do it, because being angry is not good for you. Some things happen in our life to teach us lessons and you suffer not in vain. May be it's the lesson, that you should choose friends more carefully or don't trust your secrets to so many people. The pain you feel now is not meaningless. It will help you get cautious that this thing will never happen again. And when you're able to move on, driven by the power of your pain, you will feel incredibly freeing.