You know your friend for ages and love them, but sometimes they comment on something, that you find to be offensive or racist. What should you do: keep silence or tell something back? Find out how you can handle an offensive comment from a friend.
Every person is unique, that's why your own story about the way your friend offended you will never be the same like others'. No matter what happened between you and your friend, there is a general rule what you should do in this case. And it's not keeping silence or freaking out.
Don't supply a supportive reaction. You can teach your friend a lesson by giving them comments, that don't support them. Your friend won't get the reaction they were expecting to have. And now their embarrassment and insecure can be used against them.
Think what you want to tell. Don't tell anything that comes first to mind. Your words might have an undesirable effect. Choose words correctly and make sure that you get the point without attacking your friend. If you show your emotions or get angry, it will distract your friend from what you're trying to tell them.
Stand your ground. People don't always accept their mistakes from the first time, that's why your friend might try to convince you that what they think is right, while you're wrong. Stand on your ground. It's much better then keeping silence (it's the sign that you've given up) or backing down to keep the peace (the sign that you're hesitating about what you've said). Your friend should understand that you don't approve their words!
Express your disappointment. Don't expect that you can change deep racial prejudices or offensive manner of your friend with the help of one conversation only. Your friend might continue to say offensive things or defend their original comment. You have to show your disappointment and ask them to stop telling these things in your presence.
Find another topic. If you feel like you can't get anywhere right now, find another topic for conversation. Humor will ease the situation, so tell a joke. And your friend will be distracted from their offensive remarks.
Your friend's offensive remarks should make you think, whether you need this person in your life or you should go on without them. It's possible that your friend even didn't want to offend you, and now tries to protect their point of view, that seems correct to him. Just a bit of misunderstanding, isn't it? Well, you surely can forgive it. But when your friend is constantly offending you, the only way to stop it is to say “Farewell” to them.
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