How Do You Know That You're Polyamorous?
Polyamorous relationships are much talked about and many people want to try them. Whether it's a mere curiosity or a deliberate step, you should understand, what polyamorous relations include and whether they are really for you. So we're leading to the question: how do you know that you're polyamorous?
Many people misunderstand the concept of polyamorous relations. They think that this term was made up to excuse the people who are afraid or avoid commitment to other person. Or for those who want to find a lover (or even two and three) and not to be afraid to hide them from the partner. It's all wrong and has nothing to do with real polyamorous relations! They are not for people who want to legally cheat and swing. They are not for people who don't want to commit. They are only for people who trust their partners and understand that the third party helps primary relations of the couple.
The third party can change your primary relations and make them more spicy. And you can also try relations with people of the same sex and see if they will add something to your primary relations. Whatever you try, make sure that all sides of your relations know about everything!
And now let's try to find out whether you're created for polyamorous relations or not. You need to honestly answer these five simple questions. Here they are:
- Have you ever been emotionally connected or in love with two people at the same time?
- Do you have a strong desire to be engaged in a sexual exchange with someone outside of your relations?
- Are you jealous? In fact, will you accept the fact that someone else has sex with your partner?
- Do you shy commitment because you don't want to be tied to one person only?
- Do you like the idea of being in relations with ladies and men and don't have to pretend to be a person who you're really not?
How did it go? Did you answer “Yes” to all questions or just a couple of them? If all your five answers were “Yes”, then you're polyamorous person and these relations are perfect for you. But if you answered “Yes” to only a couple of questions, it means that you're not polyamorous at all or you need to work on some issues of your own.
Remember, that these questions don't really define that you're totally polyamorous. They serve only as indicators, however, they can also indicate that you have problems with commitment and avoidance behavior. Only you can tell for sure, whether it's so or not. Analyze your previous relations and think what you really missed, wanted and didn't want? What would change them and make them better? Some people are inborn polys and they know for sure who they are. And some have to think hard to understand what kind of relations really make them happy and why.
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