A lot of men avoid dating single mothers because they don't want additional responsibility that comes with this sort of relationship. However, there also are many men who think that dating a single mother is a great thing. So who's right? Like any relationship, a relationship with a woman with kids has its advantages and disadvantages. What are the pros and cons of dating a single mom?
Pro. She is most likely a mature woman. Well, it's not a given, because everyone is different. However, there indeed is a high probability that she is a mature person who knows what she wants and won't play games with you. Many single moms are relatively low-maintenance because they are used to taking care of themselves.
Con. Beware of the ex. The father of her kids will always be in their life in some capacity. Maybe he's a good man who wants to take care of his children. Maybe he's a jerk. Maybe he'll try to win her back. Be that as it may, you can't get rid of him because you have no right to devoid the kids of communication with their biological father.
Pro/Con. She wants a serious relationship. Most single moms don't do casual because their personal life affects their children's lives, so they have to be really careful. If you want a long-term committed relationship, it's a good thing because you're most likely on the same page. But if all you need is a hook up or casual dating, we recommend against dating a single mom.
Pro. She won't insist that you spend all your free time with her. A single mom needs to devote much time to her kids, so she won't get needy or clingy. She'll understand when you have a sudden change of plans because her schedule isn't always predictable either and she is busy herself.
Con. You won't be her top priority. Her kids will always be her number one priority, at least until they turn 18 or you get married and start raising the kids together. She will cancel dates because of child emergencies, she won't be able to spend the night at your place often, and sleepovers at her place with the kids around will be a no-no until you are absolutely sure that you're in this for the long run.
Pro. She's less likely to be selfish. She is used to taking care about her kids, so she is able to recognize the importance of having other people in her life. You can expect her to be caring and supportive. Just remember that she needs your care and support, too. Single moms are not Superwomen, they can get tired of juggling responsibilities.
Con. You might not get along with her kids. A single mom is a package deal. She'll always choose her kids over everyone else, so if they don't like you, the success of your relationship with her is questionable. She isn't just looking for a man who will make her happy; she is looking for a man who will make her kids happy.
So, is dating a single mother really worth it? That's up to you to decide. Just keep in mind that dating a women with kids is a responsibility, and you need to be absolutely sure you are willing to take this responsibility.
- 8 Tips for Dating a Single Dad, 10 Things You Have to Know About Dating a Single Mom, Pros and Cons of Dating a Single Dad, 7 Tips for Getting Along With Your Stepkids