You might have met some people, who like to be in the center of everyone's attention and hold a conversation. At first it seems just nice, but then you notice, that they never shut up. You get bored, tired and finally mad with them. You decide never ever meet that person, but what to do, if it's your colleague or a friend? Let's find out, how to deal with talkative people.
There are many reasons why people become chatterboxes, so if you want to find the right way to deal with them, first you have to understand, why these people talk too much. People, who are just buffoons are the easiest to deal with. They talk just because they like to and seek for our appreciation. Whether they succeed or not depends only on the listener.
The second group of chatterboxes is very hard to deal with, because they never stop talking due to their own fears. They think that if they stop talking, they will die, well, not in the full sense of the word. They need attract attention of others to themselves, and if people stop listening to them, their will stop living. This is a psychological problem, that may stem from almost anything, including loneliness, insecurity, lack of communication and attention from other people. If you find the heart of the problem, you might change the life of this person!
However, now you have to deal with chatterboxes, and your actions depend on your own relations with them. Friends, coworkers, members of family and even passers-by need their own approaches to them.
At the Office
If you are tired of a chatterbox at work, just try to avoid this person. But it's easier said than done. So use the following technique: include a word “hard stop” into your lexicon. This expression sounds to people like something set in stone, it can't be changed at any circumstances. Next time, when you can't omit conversation with a chatterbox, just tell, that you have a hard stop at 11 a.m. and you can dig into a problem only now. This will help you lead the conversation.
The second nice way of dealing with chatterboxes is playing to be dumb. Constantly repeat, if you get something, that you colleague says, right. It will make the talker to focus.
There might be friends who are really dear to you, but their love to talking is incredible, right? You just cant snap them. The same way you can't break off, for instance, your friend's wife or girlfriend. Try to keep the relations with these people, by meeting or taking them to places, where talking is not allowed. This can be a cinema, any kind of workshop etc. Think of any activities, that you both like and chose them instead of parties or dinners.
Never forget that sometimes people can dominate in the conversation and you have to listen. If your friend goes through a hard time, let him or her talk. Next time this person will support you, when you will be in an alike situation.
- How to Improve Your Communication Skills