Keeping good relations between two families is very difficult, because you never know what kind of mistake anyone of you can make. And when kids are crying, the phone is ringing, the turkey is burning in the oven and your mother-in-law is nagging you, one your word can ruin the good relations forever. So you'd better remember these 6 things you should never say to your mother-in-law.
#1 I hate you. No matter how much you dislike your mother-in-law from hell, you should never tell her, that you hate her. Telling this will lead to the war between two of you, and your husband will also be involved in it. You won't be able to move your relations with in-laws and even your husband in a positive way, that's why keep these words never uttered.
#2 I won't let you see my children again. It's your trump card, but you should never use it. Now we're talking not only about your personal grudge against your mother-in-law, it's also about your own kids. They have right to see their grandmother and they wouldn't like to hear something like that from you. Just imagine the situation, when you will become a mother-in-law and your children will tell you the same. How does it feel now?
#3 You shouldn't parent this way. Your parenting rules may be totally different from the rules of your mother-in-law, but no matter how much you don't like it, let her help you. The only situation when you should say it is when you have strict doctor's instructions to follow. Remember, your mother-in-law has raised your spouse and she was successful. So next time when you're given unsolicited advice, just listen and go on your own way.
#4 Come any time. What's wrong about showing your mother-in-law that you'd like to see her any time? But your hospitality may cause the lack of boundaries between you and the extended family. Your mother-in-lay hears, that she can come any time without checking with you first.
#5 We have no time to see you. Yes, your schedule can be so tight, that you barely find time for your husband, but you should never say to your in-laws, that you have no time to see them. This way you let them know, that they are not very important for you and it might make your mother-in-law push even harder to spend time with you. You can tackle this situation by telling, that your in-laws are welcome, but the day they've chosen doesn't work for you and ask them to call later.
#6 I don't need your help. Whenever your mother-in-law wants to help you, accept it, even if you don't need it. It shows your respect and gratefulness for what she does for you. And if you don't like the way your mother-in-law washes dishes, wash them once more when she's gone.
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