National Stepfamily Day Date in the current year: September 16, 2025

A stepfamily is a family in which at least one parent has children from previous relationships or marriages. Stepfamilies are called “simple” when only one spouse has a child or children and the couple has no children together, and “complex” or “blended” when each spouse has at least one child from a previous relationship.

Today, more than half of all marriages end in divorce, which means that stepfamilies are much more common than they used to be. In the United States, for example, more than 30% of minors live in a stepfamily environment.

According to researcher James Bray, co-author of the blended family handbook Stepfamilies: Love, Marriage, and Parenting in the First Decade, new stepfamilies face three main challenges: living and financial arrangements, changes in parenting, and resolving feelings about the previous marriage.

Some people mistakenly think that once they marry their partner, everything will magically fall into place. In reality, creating a blended family takes time, patience, and effort, especially when young children are involved. Here are some tips for those who are thinking about bringing two families together.

Take it slow. It is generally recommended that you wait to introduce your children to a new partner until your relationship has lasted for 6–12 months, especially if your previous marriage ended due to the death of your spouse. Once the initial introductions have been made, you will still need to take things slow to make sure everyone is comfortable with each other.

Set boundaries. If your children’s other parent is alive and very much present in their lives, it is important to make it clear that the role of stepparent is different from the role of natural parent. While stepparents deserve respect and their opinions should be considered, they must never undermine the natural parents.

Do not overcompensate. In trying to bond with their stepchildren, some people end up overcompensating by neglecting their natural children. This will inevitably create rifts rather than bring families together. Of course, it is important to spend time with your stepchildren and to make sure that your own children spend time with their stepparent – but it is just as important to spend time with your own children and together as a family.

Seek professional advice if needed. There are many resources available today for stepfamilies, from self-help books to family therapy. If you are not sure how to approach blending your families or feel that things are not quite working, an outside perspective and professional help may be just what you need – as long as everyone is on board and open to trying.

National Stepfamily Day was started in 1997 by Christy Borgeld. When she married a man who had children from a previous marriage, she struggled to fit into the role of stepmom, but resources for new stepparents and blended families were scarce in the 1990s. So Borgeld made it her mission to bring stepfamilies together and break down the stigma and stereotypes surrounding stepfamilies.