Arriving of a new baby into the family of your son or daughter makes you feel happy, because now you're a granny! You feel like you experience the happiness of the motherhood, but wait a minute, you're the granny, not the mother, and it can lead to different conflicts with your own child. These guidelines will help you become a great grandma for your adult children.
Love your grandchild as yours, but don't think it's really yours. Your grandchild is very sweet and although you were present when the baby was born, don't ever think, that you're the mother. It means, that you don't have to advice your child how to take care, hold and feed the baby. Accept the role of support team and help, only when you're asked for.
Make your house safe for the child. The times when you had to keep ornaments, trifles and flowers out of reach of your own toddlers are gone and you might have forgotten about the strong will of every child to learn the miracles of this world. So whenever your grandchild comes to your place, make sure that it's totally safe. Keep all fragile things out of reach of your grandchild, and it means out of reach of a child standing on a chair.
Always be equipped. Chose clothes with big pockets, where you can keep hundreds of tissues. You will need them all year long, because the season of running noses, chocolate smeared mouths and bleeding knees is never over.
Practice. The buggies that you used when you were a mom were totally different that they are now. You may spend half an hour struggling to turn that bundle of metal into a buggy, while your grandchild is screaming in a car. So practice till you know how to handle the buggy or pushchair.
Listen to your adult children. Yes, you've raised your children and it seems to be that you were successful, but don't think, that you're the best in it. There are so many new rules today regulating the life of parents you don't know about. So always listen to your children, because they might know something, that you don't.
Don't break the rules. Your will to treat your grandchild with a cookie or a cup of sweet juice is natural and understandable, however, if your adult children forbid it, follow this rule. Do you remember the feeling, when your own mother tried to break your rules of raising the child? If no, now it's time to recall it.
Arrange your visits properly. You want to be with your grandchild as long as possible, and it's natural. But don't forget, that you have to arrange your visits properly. Make sure that you don't stay for more than a few days and never interrupt the household routines. Don't become the boss at your child's place and make yourself helpful.
Don't be always available. You've got your own life too, that's why it's normal to be busy sometimes and refuse to babysit. Moreover, if you're always available, it will make your adult child feel that you change your plans just to help. Don't make them feel so uncomfortable and allow yourself to have some rest too.
- How to Become Friends With Your Adult Children, 6 Tips for Getting Along With Your Daughter-in-Law, How to Deal With a Difficult Daughter-in-Law, How to Connect With Your Grandchildren