Different parents prefer different styles of parenting. Some parents think that it's important to be friends with their children, while others are convinced that parenting and friendship don't mix well. Be that as it may, many parent-child relationships start transforming into friendship when children become adults. How to become friends with your parents?
Work through past issues. If you want to be on friendly terms with your parents, you need to put the past behind. Of course, childhood issues aren't something you can simply forget. If your parents have changed, you need to forgive them and move on. If they are still behaving as they did when you were a child, you need to gently address the issue. We can't guarantee that things will work out, but you can never know till you try.
Keep in touch. You've moved out from your parents' house and don't spend as much time as you used to with them. It is important that you keep in touch with your parents, especially when you live in different cities or even states. You can text and call each other, schedule regular Skype sessions, etc. Communication is essential, so make sure you communicate regularly. The most common mistake adult children make is to only phone home when they need help. Don't be that child. Talk to your parents when everything is okay, just because you can and want to talk to them.
Develop shared interests. Friends tend to share common interests, backgrounds, occupations, or experiences. If you and your parents want to bond as adults, you should find common interests. Don't be afraid to step out of your comfort zone. If you try new and exciting things together, it will bring you closer.
Don't focus on things you cannot agree on. There might be things you are completely opposite on, such as politics, religion, LGBT rights, certain life choices. If you want to get along with your parents, try to avoid sensitive topics. Just agree to disagree and talk about something different.
Take your relationship out of their house. If the only place where you meet is your parent's house, it is very easy to slip into the old relationship pattern. Try inviting your parents to dinner at your place, meeting at a restaurant or going to concerts together. It will help you feel like equals.
Spend one-on-one time with each of them. If you only spend time with your parents as a couple, you don't get the opportunity to bond with each of them. Spending quality time with each of your parents is a good way to break down your old style of interaction. Just make sure you distribute your time evenly between them so no one feels left out.
- How to Build a Good Parent and Child Relationship, How to Get Over Adult Sibling Rivalry, How Can You Handle Uninterested Grandparents?, 5 Tips for Boomerang Kids